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Hey everybody, and welcome to my HomePage!!! In memory of my brother..(1-26-81 - 1-28-02) |
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I guess I will start by explaining myself.My name is Tosha and I'm 17 I live in tennessee. My best friend is Amber...I love you Amber!!!!!! You're the coolest Although I'm cooler than the coolest but you get the point right..? lol Well always Remember P.S.O.C and AHF!!!!! I like to ride around with my friends, and do whatever we want to do. Most of the time we just be stupid, because everything else is boring! It's funner being stupid than to be really boring, and of course were really good at it. My nephews is a big part of my life. My brother as I mentioned before left to soon, but he left two boys a 2 yr old and a 3 yr old.. They live with me and my parents, and I dont know what I would do if they weren't involved in my life! I also have a sister, shes married, and living her own life. |
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My poetry |
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*UNTITLED* So many questions Too many lies Sometimes I lay down And I start to cry Cant you just tell me That lifes suppose to be this way Cant you just tell me Everythings going to be ok |
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So many problems In such a short time I dont know what to do Or when I'm gonna die My dad said Im stuck inside A world thats not to kind And all I have to do Is make up these stupid rhymes |
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Maybe I'm not happy As you can probably see But what my dad had said Has always stuck with me I'm only one person And I cant do it all But if we all stick together Maybe I would have someone To catch me if I fall |
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In our generation Having sex is ok And doing pills and ecstasy Is all that a person needs But I'm different Everybody else is the same I live my life day after day Doing what I want to do Instead of what I see |
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*FLASHBACKS* He walks up to the door And silently stares Wondering how He's doing now |
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He knew he needed him When he was younger But he's doing well All by himself |
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He remembers saying, "I don't need you" But nothing he says Will bring him back today |
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Here he is With a sad face Wondering what To do after this |
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He's just a teenager And he's on his own Not knowing the rain Is holding back his tears He's been gone For just a year |
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He looks at the rain And stares at the ground He's thinking of him Not making a sound |
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He walks out the door And slams the screen Saying I dont need you You mean nothing to me |
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The bad words he whispers Not knowing that His dad's been dead For just a year |
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He turns away from the door And walks to the road With silence he see's That he wasn't mean He had it made But now it's to late |
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He screams the words "I hate you" And with silence he see's How much he really needs "His love" |
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*LIFE* A tear has fallen on the ground once more But nobody knows what for Maybe she's not happy Maybe she don't care Or maybe she's just tired Of nobody being there |
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Another person crying Because of something someone said She knows they didn't mean it But it goes straight to her head She has alot of family Although she has not a single friend And she has no idea What might happen in the end |
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A young boy looking forward With a gun in his hand He's wanting some sweet revenge Maybe he's not wanted Maybe he's just scared Or maybe he's just tired Of nobody being there |
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Another child dying Because of something someone said He knows you didn't mean But it goes straight to his head He keeps on shooting Many innocent children dead When he gets finished He aims for his own head |
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Have you ever heard the saying Words never hurt? Nobody ever forgets The meanness in their life They keep it in their head And no matter how many times they see you Everytime they look at you They remember |
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*WALLS FALL* Sometimes I sit staring at the walls Thinking what would I do if they fall Who would I be able to call? |
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You just can't run to mom or dad Whenever something you love has gone bad I lost two of the people I communicated with the most |
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What happened to one of them wasn't their fault There was a car coming and he never saw it He passed away when they rushed him from the scene Nobody even heard him let out a scream Oh, how I wish my brother was still here To help me get through all of these tears Now I have no one to make me see Maybe it should have been me? |
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The guy said he was sorry for all the pain he caused But sometimes saying sorry don't help much Am I wrong for thinking such |
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He left us two of the most beautiful boys So I will stay strong For they need me Almost as much as I need them |
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My other best friend was my sister She fell in love with a guy And within a blink of my eyes They got married Now don't get me wrong he's a wonderful person But it took away the person who made me feel important She is still here except she's not the same Getting married really makes people change |
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Which leaves me all alone I'm trying to fight these troubles on my own Maybe I should just run to mom and dad But, would I make them sad Is it really that bad? |
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I will just keep it inside for now Someday I will figure out how |
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Maybe one day I will come out of my dream And realize life isn't as bad as it seems Why do I feel all this pain Why do I feel like I'm going insane? |
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Oh God, please don't let these walls fall And if you do Promise me there will be someone I can call? |
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*MY SHOES* People don't understand How hard it is to lose someone you love People don't understand How hard it is to feel so unloved People don't understand What it's like to be me People don't understand Because people just can't see |
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I know it's hard to imagine Everything that's happened to me I know it's hard to imagine Everything you just can't see |
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I get jealous sometimes When I see people doing what they want to do I get jealous sometimes Because I can't do those things too I get jealous sometimes Not because I hate you or anything I get jealous sometimes Because you can brag about everything |
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How would you like it To be in my shoes How would you like it To understand everything I do How would you like it To imagine what you want to be How would you like it If for one day You had a reason to be jealous of me |